HAIRDOO "OH BOO"

nancpop-n-zgirl-n-i went to the cabin for Labor Day Weekend - mostly to get much needed chores done - the area is still reeling from the ice storm at the end of this past winter - limbs broken and trees down everywhere...and we do not need them close to the old homestead.

all is going well until something hits me saturday night and knocks me down - ears - eyes - head - nose - fever - extreme fatty-gew - you name it - surely i'm going to die in about four more days of this!

...oh boo...

sunday night as i'm getting ready to go take a long, hot bath, zgirl challenges pop to a game of YAHTZEE and then i hear her ask him if he'll brush her hair - his dull response, "it's what i live for."

...oh boo...

she then asks him if he'll french braid her hair - he replies, "don't know how." her, "oh sure you do." he sternly answers, "AHA! i'll bet 'too slim and tails draggin'' (his term of endearment for her friend who's a boy) CAN'T braid either!" in my mind i hear him saying something like the farmer would say, "nanny-nanny, noo-noo!"

zgirl responds, "when we get home i'll find out and if he doesn't know how, then he soon will!"

...oh boo...

SCHNAPPS "OH BOO"

here awhile back...

when pop was working out of state, i was clearing some land on the mountain and hired three or four young men to help me a couple of days a week. they were all between the ages of 13-17, but they could barely keep up with me!

we were cutting brush, pulling stumps, moving boulders and large rocks, burning brush, mowing and weedeating.

i kept plenty of sodas, water and tea on hand for break times and expected them to take regular breaks of about five or ten minutes EVERY hour - the arkansas heat isn't what gets you - it's the humidity. if it's 85 degrees and 70 percent humidity, you can lose much needed waterweight and develop heat stroke in a hurry.

after a couple of weeks of this, when i'd ask the boys what they wanted to drink, all but one stated what they wanted and i asked the one who didn't, "what do you want to drink, nutcase (not his real name)?" he said, "i'll have what you're having!" "okay, unsweet tea it is." he responded, "no, i want some of that SCHNAPPS i smell on your breath all day!" "WTF ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!?" "you can't fool me, mzz nanc - you're drinking peppermint schnapps and that's what i'll have too." "listen you little turd, i'm NOT drinking schnapps, i NEVER drink schnapps and i NEVER drink alcohol before six or seven in the evening and i certainly would NEVER drink it with a 17 year old - NOW GET BACK TO WORK!"

he was a persistent little devil - even wanting to smell my breath so i got all myself in his face to where i could see my reflection in his bulging eyes and gave him a breath he'll never forget - he responds, "see, i told you you're drinking schnapps." okay, at this point i'm pretty sure i can take him...and then i remember i had put two of these into my mouth at the beginning of the job.

...oh boo...

everest WAS my favorite chewing gum before altoids, but if you put two in your mouth it would literally knock the wind out of a sissy, so i said, "IT'S NOT SCHNAPPS! it's these, here have TWO."

...oh boo...

that'll teach'im!

ROCKY ROAD "OH BOO"

short story long scenario:

in the second week of february, 2009, an ice storm went through this part of the state and although we had no idea the damage it did other than the area we live...we found that the area where our cabin is suffered much more so than the insulated little area we live now.

we've been spending quite a bit of time there in the past few weeks dragging limbs and brush, burning, raking and just making ourselves tired from saturday through sunday. amazingly enough not one single limb or tree came down and crushed the cabin - we had ONE bend in our rain gutter that nancpop forced back into place. the ONLY devastating instance of destruction was that a not-so-mighty (14" base) oak snapped and took our phone and power out, but alas, not before the power went out to the area for the week - so we had no hot wires flopping about on the ground.

the cabin has been running off extension cords from the power pole, which is a pain in the arse, mostly because of the refrigerator - you cannot run a microwave, the ceiling fan, a heater in the bathhouse, or a television without tripping a breaker and stumbling around in the dark with a flashlight to turn everything back on!

there is a routine to every trip to the mountain. first, get there! unload the vehicle, start a fire in the woodstove or turn on the a/c (whichever the weather calls for - we used BOTH this weekend past), put all the groceries away, take all the bedding out, put towels and toiletries in the bathhouse, pump water from tanks to holding barrels in bathhouse, begin the water heating process which usually takes the better part of a day as we heat it in a five gallon stock pot, fill the bird feeders - and for the most part these past several weeks, cut limbs, drag brush, rake until you think your arms will fall off, and if by good fortune it is or has been raining - start some bigarse fires!

sunday morning on my way to the bathhouse i noticed that one of my feeders on a pole stuck in a stump was bent completely over to the ground - perplexed i asked pop, "how on earth do you think THAT happened?" he had no good answer so we went about our day well into the evening until we were just dog-tired enough to sit down, eat and watch a movie - no yahtzee this time.

monday morning found us packing up, making sure all the propane was turned off, things unplugged, make sure all leaf and debris fires were out - and of course, pop had to go check his deer feeding areas and as i'm going toward the front door to carry something to the deck, here he comes with a big turd in his hands and asks, "do you know what this is?" "i'm sure it's a rocky road candy bar with sunflower seeds instead of nuts in it.", thinking to myself, but thought better and allowed my demure side to kick in, "why no - what is it?" "it's a bear turd, pretty fresh too i might add - probably laid just since we've been here. when i broke it open, it was still oozy on the inside which means probably less than 48 hours old." "oh." "do you know how i know?" "no." "well, a bear and a cow are the only animals that poop like this and you don't see any cows out there, now do you?" "no."

"that bear is more than likely the animal that pulled your feeder over to the ground the first night we were here." "really?" "here, smell it (handing it out to me)." "not even with YOUR nose!"

the first night we were there found me out in the bathhouse with no weapon save my cellphone - i had to walk right past that feeder on my way back into the cabin. i'm thinkin' that bear must've heard of me - that or there was a renegade cow on the loose with opposable thumbs and the ability to stand up to a six foot height and pull that feeder and pole clean over to the ground...

...oh boo...

note to self: take gun to bathhouse.