CHRISTMAS STORY "OH BOO"

Firefighters rescue boy whose tongue was stuck to a metal pole.

Strange, you say?:

When nte was approximately eight years old, it seemed she'd always be hollering for me when I went to the restroom or any other room for that matter. I recall asking on a number of occasions, perhaps even begging her to PUHLEEZE approach me and talk to me rather than call across a room or through walls because I WILL ignore you.

One day while showering I could hear her from two rooms away calling for me, garbled though it was and I shouted back, "I TOLD YOU TO PLEASE COME AND TALK DIRECTLY TO ME - DON'T HOLLER!" My shower resumed and she kept getting louder and I thought to myself, Sophia Loren, perhaps someone has broken in and they've accosted her and she needs me!

So as not to arouse suspicion of the intruder, I leave the shower running, step from the tub with my head all soapy, grab a towel and the toilet brush and edge my way out of the bathroom - through the bedroom I slinked along the wall, dripping wet with shampoo running into my eyes - around the corner into the front room - I edge up beside the refrigerator door where it is noticeable the door is OPEN and she is whimpering now - I step around the door fully prepared to use the toilet brush in whatever manner to bring great harm to the person hurting my baby!

There she is, standing there with her little hand stuck to the wall of the freezer and I'm like WTF? (In case y'all're wondering what the "F" is in my "WTF's" - it's FLUFF! Of course, back then it could have been any number of words...oh boo...) I adamantly ask, "WHAT are you doing with your hand stuck to the freezer (as I'm now naked with the toilet brush on the floor)? I hover over the sink trying to get a pan of hot water to get her hand unstuck while the shampoo by this time has removed the first membrane on my eyeballs - and she responds, "I wet my hand and stuck it to the freezer just to see what it would do."

...oh boo...