SCHNAPPS "OH BOO"

here awhile back...

when pop was working out of state, i was clearing some land on the mountain and hired three or four young men to help me a couple of days a week. they were all between the ages of 13-17, but they could barely keep up with me!

we were cutting brush, pulling stumps, moving boulders and large rocks, burning brush, mowing and weedeating.

i kept plenty of sodas, water and tea on hand for break times and expected them to take regular breaks of about five or ten minutes EVERY hour - the arkansas heat isn't what gets you - it's the humidity. if it's 85 degrees and 70 percent humidity, you can lose much needed waterweight and develop heat stroke in a hurry.

after a couple of weeks of this, when i'd ask the boys what they wanted to drink, all but one stated what they wanted and i asked the one who didn't, "what do you want to drink, nutcase (not his real name)?" he said, "i'll have what you're having!" "okay, unsweet tea it is." he responded, "no, i want some of that SCHNAPPS i smell on your breath all day!" "WTF ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!?" "you can't fool me, mzz nanc - you're drinking peppermint schnapps and that's what i'll have too." "listen you little turd, i'm NOT drinking schnapps, i NEVER drink schnapps and i NEVER drink alcohol before six or seven in the evening and i certainly would NEVER drink it with a 17 year old - NOW GET BACK TO WORK!"

he was a persistent little devil - even wanting to smell my breath so i got all myself in his face to where i could see my reflection in his bulging eyes and gave him a breath he'll never forget - he responds, "see, i told you you're drinking schnapps." okay, at this point i'm pretty sure i can take him...and then i remember i had put two of these into my mouth at the beginning of the job.

...oh boo...

everest WAS my favorite chewing gum before altoids, but if you put two in your mouth it would literally knock the wind out of a sissy, so i said, "IT'S NOT SCHNAPPS! it's these, here have TWO."

...oh boo...

that'll teach'im!

"oh boo" moment 011508

okay, so the other night when we were on our way to the school play, as we zipped through the 25 mph posted sign, i said to nancpop, "HEY! it's 25 here, put the car in second and that insures you don't go over the speed limit!"

in his most masculine voice he "shushed" me and said, "QUIET WOMAN!" i allow him to do this to soothe his masculine ego..."okay..." i was thinking in my mind.

but first, this message from another "oh boo" moment:

a few years ago, the school band teacher insulted zgirl in front of the whole class and hurt her feelings needlessly and after she told me about it, i said, "don't worry about it, he will be taken care of - it's not our battle."

monday morning, his wife (the other band teacher) said that over the weekend he ran over a ground hornet nest and ended up in the hospital in anaphylactic shock from the multitudes of stings he'd received...oh boo...

my husband said that i needed to STOP putting whammies on everyone! and i responded that i DON'T put whammies on anybody, as that was not my job.

okay, back to the original story.

as a woman, it is my duty to do a little backseat driving - after all, i AM in the backseat (by choice as the seats are more comfortable) and while on our way to the school play i suggested we were going a little fast for town...

after mulling this over for a day or so, i said out loud, "Lord, please give pop a wake-up call and make him slow down before somebody gets hurt!" i did this two other times and he was pulled over and warned each time.

this evening, as we were visiting about all our days held for us - out of the blue he said, "you're not going to like this, but i got a speeding ticket today."

well, i started laughing my tail end off! earlier that day i had told zgirl, "i hope your father gets a ticket for speeding - i don't know what else to do! he goes too fast and all the while talking on his cell phone! he needs a ticket - the warnings didn't work!"

after i told him about my incident with zgirl, he sunk back in his chair and i asked him, "are you going to slow down now?" he responded, "yes."

...oh boo...

p.s. - NO, i am NOT into voodoo, but believe wholeheartedly everything happens for a good reason and in all things i give thanks.